why?

why do i need to have those days when im fine when im bad, when im so pissed off when i miss him more and so on and so forth... i almost cry today talking about him again.. damned im so damn weak, and my best friend is in the hospital.. i hate so much boys.. i hate them, yah i keep my thought when i was a teeneger cuz its true.... why is it too hard for them to understand when we screw up???? why whenever they made crap to us we gotta forgive as nothing ever happened and when we do sth they throw us away as if we were nothing at all!!!! fuck them!!! im gonna turn lesbian... i wana turn lesbian... i quit men... i hate them so much! and now with the example of D's bf i see why i hate them so much!!!!! they are soooo practical!!! ohh yess... whenever they want sth they gotta have it or they make anything to get it, expecially sex even when we dont want it... or they dont even think a lil bit or feel when we really want it and when we just do it for satisfy them... i cant believe they are sooooo damn bliiinddd and we are so damn stupid that we keep being with them after all... u know why???? cuz we think in hope!!! cuz we have faith that one day thats gonna change and they are gonna think and act with their heart too and with their feelings.. but not with their hormons..

fucking hormons.. then u ur fuckin hand whenever they want sex and dont pissed us off!!!!! buggers!

i cant believe im crying a river for him... i cant believe it i still think in him and i still have feelings for him...

i hate to be a girl... i should have been a bird... or i donno.. a lion ... i hate to be human... i hate me so much!!! and to be honest i donno if i will survive till the end of the year, i hope to stay alive but we never known...

im so tired! and i wanna eat fruit..